Meditation. one

The sixteenth year of my life has been a crowded one, so to say. I learned and discovered many things. Maybe I've grown up, maybe not, but I have definitely changed myself in one way or another in this time.


->I have discovered my need for fantasy, for impossible. It cannot be true, or real but I wish for it with all my heart, even if it hurts. Because of this craving for mythological stories, I have discovered a movie I truly love. Stardust. It's an enchanting story that has impressed me because of its profound meanings. After watching it, I was not thinking of the costumes, nor of the fantastic special effects. I was wondering about my own life, about how I wish to be, how I am, what good or bad really is. Even if in most of the stories the limit between good and evil can be crossed by characters, the important thing about them is that they simply remind us the existence of them. In a crazy world, we forget what good or bad really is.


->The past months I have been questioning myself a lot about my life. We, as teenagers, feel like we could do anything because WE CAN. Now, we are choosing our paths in life and our decisions may be crucial.

->I have learned that I really should not rush myself in any kind of inter human relationships, friendship or more than that. People can influence your opinion about other people and I should not let myself influenced in the future as nobody is at it seems. Friendship or something more than that is a feeling that should be unconditional, regardless of money, looks or needs. As rational beings, needs should not be influencing our existence or clouding our minds. Maybe this year has been a tough one, as I have learned myself I should stay away of selfish people and how to see that feature in someone. That kind of humans dramatize everything and do not care about how you feel in any context at all, having a strong opinion about themselves that is not even close to the truth. Letting them know that they are wrong is trigger for bitter words, for judgment coming from their side, and it hurts.

->I regret many things I have done, said and felt. The non-presence of regrets is impossible to me as I made so many mistakes. I regret many things, but not most of my decisions. Especially, I regret letting myself carried away too fast and not being careful enough, doing things "just to be done".

->Although I know that I should not trust people as much as I do sometimes, I started to embrace some of them with pure friendship, with warmth, and doing that does make me feel warmer too.

-> I realized that I cannot stop caring about everything surrounding me and that this simple fact makes me feel better every day.

-> There is nothing you can do to avoid harsh times. They will come anyway. But what it matters is how you cope with them and how they find you. A drop of optimism was good for me and a smile makes a day brighter.

Song: James Morrison - Please don't stop the rain

2 Comments

Anonymous said...

Regrets? It's only my personal opinion that one feels whole when he acc the mistakes he has made, not regret them....I do get your points, I can even say I relate to them... "happy new year" and you know what I mean by that.

N-am :) said...

->Ma bucur enorm sa descopar ca mai exista lume care vrea sau incerca sa creada in fantasy stuff. Am vazut si eu Stardust si a fost intradevar magic.
In privinta raului si a binelui.. intradevar, in realitate nu mai e asa bine definitivata limita dintre cele doua. Nu uitam care e raul si care binele, ci doar nu constientizam diferentele dintre ele.

->n-ai de ce sa-ti faci prea mari griji in privinta algerilor. Orice ai alege poti sa o faci sa iasa bine in viitor, asa ca nu exista cai gresite si cai corecte.

->In privinta relatiilor, privesti destul de matur vad pentru varsta ta, si pare'se ca ca ai si inteles chestiile esentiala. O relatie aparuta in graba... la fel se si duce. In privinta factorilor gen: bani, look si needs.. inca fac baza alegerii unui prieten in societatea asta. Daca poti sa le fentezi, felicitari.
Oamenii egoisti sunt unii din cei mai puternici oameni tocmai pentru ca nu le pasa de restu ci doar de persoana lor.. dar asa cum bine ai precizat si tu au o parere personala departe de adevarata realitate ceea ce-i "prosteste" in timp. Insa cei care au o judecata buna si sunt egoisti.. fac multe in viata.

->Nu ai de ce sa regreti.. ai actionat asa cum ai crezut de cuviinta si ai invatat de fiecare data ceva nou..

->.. Esti tare sentimentala.. stiind ca n-ar trebui, tot sentimentele ti le urmezi. Esti o personalitate rara, simtindu-te bine abordand chiar si pe cei mai putini cunoscuti, cu asa caldura. Nu sunt in masura sa fac deductii despre persoana ta, insa imi place tare mult cum iti exteriorizezi sentimentele.

Sensurile anumitor fraze imi cam dau de gandit, insa din cate inteleg, imi place persoanalitatea ta, faptul ca esti optimista, sentimentala si pentru asta ai si lumea ta fantasy in care ai o anumita crezare. Din toate astea presupun ca esti si o romantica incurabila si posibil o "jumatate" de mare pret.

Desi mi-e greoi cititul si ganditul in engleza, cred ca imi va prinde bine.
Si te rog, daca vreodata dau de inteles ca am interpretat vreun sens gresit, atrage-mi atentia. Sa-mi imbunattesc si eu engleza.
Nici o problema privind adaugarea in blogroll.

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